Postcard To Gordon - Month 1

Oh Gordon, 1 month old. I’m sorry I can’t be with you.

Having said that, 2 things: First, I can’t believe you are one month old. On one hand, I feel like before I know it you will be 1 year, then 21 years old. But on the other hand, due to the very limited sleep you have allowed your mother and I to have, it seems like an eternity has passed since we’ve had a decent night sleep – aka, before you arrived.

That second thing being that I am not with you… it kills me. At the time of authoring, I’ve only been away 9 hours, and I miss you more than I could have imagined. It bothers me that by the time I return, I will have missed 20% of your life. 20% !!!. That’s like my dad being away for the last 5 years of my life. Ugh. So many changes will take place.

This past Sunday, we had our first real play time. It made me realize how much fun I can have with you – and as I promised I would, I will refrain from anticipating the future – but it gave a glimpse to the fun we will have down the road.

It was limited, but I got you all riled up. It’s amazing what a colourful little butterfly can do. You watched intently as it ‘buzzed’ past your face, and you wiggled and gurgled excitedly when it every-so-often ‘bonked’ you on the nose. At first I thought you had gas, but to my pleasant surprise, you were getting excited. I could see the concentration on your face as you attempted to figure out not only what this strange device was, but how you could interact with it. You are not quite there yet. Your dexterity is still equivalent to a wet noodle in a blender, but boy do you try.

We continued this play time for a good 15 – 20 minutes. I attribute your sleepless afternoon and inability to stay sleeping to your mind being ‘blown’ away by your once caterpillar friend.

There have been so many obvious changes in this last month. You left the comfy confines of the world you knew, to the only world I know. Your birthday is still vivid in my mind, along with the changes that followed. From hospital, to bassinet, to the crib… you are growing up. (On a side note, I need to address the love you have from your mother. She loves you so much. Do you know, she cried the first night you were in your crib because she realized her little guy is growing up.)

On your 1 month birthday, I reflect on the things that have happened, and the things your mother and I have done for you so far. Your mom and I have and will continue to do everything we can to make a better life for you. With no selfishness attached, and obviously no gratitude obtained, we work relentlessly and endlessly for you. Regardless of how it may seem at certain points in your life, please know that we have dedicated our lives for you, and the only thing we can ever hope for, is a fraction of the love returned.

I love you Gordon.

Dad